i'm so glad i didn't lose the ability to read without stopping. finished margaret atwood's oryx and crake. rather interesting book thou i must admit i did skip some parts. but well. i'm reali reali glad i can stil continue reading without stopping. the book must be interesting enough lar.
and wel, lucky bc no launches oso. hahas perhaps i might jus be able to kick my addiction. =/ yea right.
21st is coming. sighs. mayb i should jus concentrate on asking for presents. =/ materialistic me, but there's nth much to look forward to either! hmm. i shal focus on becoming an adult.
i WILL become more independent.
i SHALL become more brave (less timid.)
i SHOULD smile more despite my crooked teeth. sighs!
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excerpts from Oryx and Crake, Margaret Atwood:
"how do u account for the fact that the less we eat, the more we fuck?" asked jimmy.
"imagination, said Crake. "men can imagine their own deaths, they can see them coming, and the mere thought of impending death acts like an aphrodisiac. a dog or rabbit doesnt behave lik that. take birds - in lean season they cut down on the egs,or they wont mate at all. they put all their energy into staying alive themselves until times get better. but human beings hope they can stick their souls into someone else, some new version of themselves, and live on forever"
"as a species we're doomed by hope, then?"
"you could call it hope. that, or desperation"
"but we're doomed without hope, as well," said jimmy.
"only as individuals," said Crake cheerfully.
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maybe Crake was right, thinks Snowman. under the old dispensation, sexual competititon had been relentless and cruel: for every pair of happy lovers there was a dejected onlooker, the one excluded. love was its own transparent bubble-dome: you could see the two inside it, but you couldnt get in there yourself.
there had been the milder form: the single man at the window, drinking himself to the mournful strains of the tango. but these things could escalate into violence. extreme emotions could be lethal. if i cant have you nobody will, and so forth. death could set it.
"how much misery," Crake said one lunchtime -"how much needless despair has been caused by a series of biological mismatches, a misalignment of the hormones and pheromones? resulting in the fact that the one you love so passionately wont or cant love you. as a species w're pathetic that way: imperfectly monogamous. if we could only pair-bond for live, like gibbons, or else opt for total guilt-free promiscuity, there'd be no more sexual torment, as in the other mammal. you'd never want someone u couldnt have."
of course (said Oryx), having a money value was no substitute for love. every child should have love, every person should have it. she herself would rather have had her mother's love- the love she still continued to believe in, the love that had followed her thru the jungle in the form of a bird so she would not be too frightened or lonely- but love was undependable, it came and it went, so it was good to have a money value, because then at least those who wanted to make a profit from you would make sure u were fed enough and not damaged too much. also there weremany who had neither love nor a money value, and having one of these things was better than having nothing.
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signing off
amethyst
10:10 PM
say something'
plain.amethyst.palace
plainpalace.sally.yip
aquarian snake
Singapore
Alexandra Hill Pri, Nan Hua Sec, Victoria Junior College, NUS P h a r m12'
Lady`Mage =)
plainpalace@hotmail/gmail.com
let it go'
if you cant hold on, let it go and come back in your heart
hopes and wishes
.books
.more bc dresses!, bags
.necklaces, bracelets (to spice up boring outfits!)
.above preferably of diamonds and white gold. >< or gold. or precious stones. =P
.musical box that plays pirates of Caribbean Davy Jones soundtrack
.own room -.-
.blank nice books to write my diary
.mont blanc fountain pen ><
.supernatural, grey's anatomy, heros, charmed, csi complete DVDs